How to Eat a Jellybean
by Evil Cosmic Triplets
Summary: Lassiter is in a burgeoning relationship with Shawn and Gus, trying to find where he fits in with the dynamic duo. What do jellybeans, an innocent chocolate bunny, peeps and a microwave have to do with anything? Everything. (Slash...in case it wasn't overly obvious in the main part of the summary)


**Disclaimer:** The characters of this work of fiction belong to their creator, Steve Franks, as well as the actors who portray them, and no copyright infringement is intended through the writing and subsequent online publication of this.

**A/N:** No chocolate bunny was maimed in the creation of this work - as a matter of fact, I didn't even get one for Easter this year, though I did dye eggs. Not intended for young people, or those who can't stand uber sugary fics. Fluff, smut, and more fluff. A little bit of angsty Lassiter, and tolerant Henry. Written purely because I wanted to write about jellybeans, chocolate bunnies and peeps. Enjoy, and be sure to brush and floss your teeth afterwards.

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"Why'd you touch my jelly beans?!"

"Relax, Spencer, I had one," Lassiter held one finger up in front of the pseudo psychic detective's face and shook it, "one jelly bean."

Shawn pouted and blinked his eyes as though he was about to cry. His bottom lip trembled, and he sniffed. "But that was my favorite jelly bean."

"Oh my living..." Lassiter rolled his eyes and looked toward the ceiling. He muttered the rest of his prayer for patience to whatever deities existed.

"Hey, I warned you not to touch the jelly beans," Gus said, and he gave Lassiter a quelling look. Then, he reached around the detective and popped one of the sugary candies into his mouth, giving Lassiter a wolfish grin, and a wink as he did so.

"Shawn, wanna share?" the pharmaceutical salesman asked coyly.

"But...you just..." Lassiter sputtered and looked from Gus to Shawn.

He gave both men an incredulous look when Gus merely sauntered over to Shawn. Gus toyed with the absconded jellybean - rolling it around with his tongue, pushing it out between his lips, and grinning like a maniac with the pale yellow, white confection tucked snuggly between his teeth. It was bordering on obscene and Lassiter couldn't tear his eyes away, even as he felt himself start to blush.

Instead of getting all bent out of shape at Gus for stealing a jelly bean, Shawn had plastered his hands on either side of the other man's face and started kissing him, long and hard. It was an open-mouthed, passionate kiss that made Lassiter's mouth grow dry just watching it. He felt weak in the knees and had to grip the edge of the counter to keep from sinking to the linoleum floor.

Lassiter felt left out, and, if he was honest, he felt a little hurt by the exclusion. They'd only been a..._threesome_... (he loathed that word) for a couple of months now, and Lassiter was still trying to see where he fit in with the other two men. He loved Shawn's quirks and oddisms (definitely not a proper English word, but it fit the psychic) almost as much as he'd loathed the (only slightly) younger man when they'd first met.

And then there was Gus, the perfect complement to Shawn, and even to himself. Gus was steady and strong, and had a perfect, round, juicy little ass. The things he could do with that ass were, well, the stuff legends are made of.

Lassiter shook himself from his visions of Gus' ass, and crossed his arms over his chest. He frowned self-consciously as he watched the two men he'd grown to love, practically make love to each other with their mouths, tongues and hands. They looked like two octopi, hands everywhere, mouths latched to each other's like each was breathing for the other.

Breathless, the two men finally pulled apart.

"Mmm, pina colada," Shawn said appreciatively.

He licked his lips in a manner which would have looked cute on a two-year-old, but somehow managed to look as lascivious as it did ridiculous, on the thirty something year old. Shawn had a dreamy look on his face, and Gus looked very smug.

Gus smiled at the detective. "Now that, Lassiter, is how you eat a jelly bean."

Lassiter spied a chocolate bunny sitting on the counter, and he was suddenly struck with an idea. Smiling, he gestured toward the innocent looking bunny.

"So, Guster and Shawn, how do you eat a chocolate bunny?" Lassiter asked nonchalantly. He wasn't sure if he could pull this off, wasn't sure if he had what it would take. It went against his every instinct - to be playful, like Shawn and Gus. Once he started, there'd be no backing out. _In for a penny…_

Gus' eyes went wide, and Spencer paled. Both men's pupils dilated and they leaned over the counter, watching Lassiter's every move with hawk-like attention. Gus swallowed, his Adam's apple moving in a manner which Lassiter found rather inviting. Shawn's lips parted in an, 'O'.

When Lassiter plucked the solid milk chocolate bunny off the counter and weighed it in his hands, both men drew in shaky breaths and held them. He almost let the bunny fall back onto the counter, but took a deep breath and pushed aside his inhibitions.

Lassiter felt silly, and all of twelve years old. He sucked on his fingers and then proceeded to 'fondle' the chocolate bunny - running his thumb over its melded ears in a very suggestive manner, letting his fingers 'walk' their way down toward the bunny's non-anatomically correct nether regions, and nudging the small cotton ball-esque tail with an index finger while trying _not _to think of how Gus' tight ass would feel were he knuckle-deep inside the other man right now.

Twin gasps and groans accompanied his every action. Lassiter knew that, when this was over, he'd never be able to look at a chocolate bunny ever again, at least not without blushing, and feeling like he'd molested one of the Easter Bunny's offspring.

When Lassiter brought the chocolate rabbit up to his mouth and began nibbling on the outer edge of an ear, all the while watching his two lovers out of the corner of his eye, he was suddenly sandwiched between two very eager and wriggly men. Gus' dick was poking into his thigh, and Shawn's was prodding him in the ass.

Lassiter sucked on the bunny's ear, making soft 'popping' sounds every time it left his mouth as he pushed and pulled it in and out of the orifice. He rolled his tongue around the now smooth chocolate, and worked more of it into his mouth, trying not to gag as he did so - this was nothing, and everything like sucking Shawn, licking a path along the psychic's shaft, wrapping his lips around the hard length.

Gus' chin jerked, and he snapped at the bunny's backside, capturing it in his teeth and breaking off the tail end. He looked a little like a rabid animal, and Lassiter had never been more turned on. Shawn reached around Lassiter's shoulder, his cock nestling itself even more firmly into Lassiter's ass cheeks as he pressed closer to capture Gus' mouth with his own.

Lassiter moaned, and rubbed himself up against Gus' leg. Shawn turned his attention from Gus' mouth to the mangled chocolate bunny that was still sticking halfway out of Lassiter's mouth. He latched onto it, and, while Gus suckled and nibbled at Lassiter's collarbone and rhythmically rubbed himself against Lassiter's thigh, Shawn ate his way toward Lassiter's mouth.

They kissed. Shawn's tongue entered Lassiter's mouth like a crusader hell-bent on pillaging and plundering the warm, chocolaty goodness within. Lassiter yielded, tasting the chocolate mixed with the pina colada from the jelly bean Shawn had stolen from Gus' mouth earlier, and marveling at how the overly sweet flavor didn't make him want to puke.

Gus' mouth inched upward, and soon, all three of them were kissing and grinding against each other. Shawn and Gus took turns ravaging Lassiter's mouth. Lassiter could feel an orgasm building, and he bit back a, _Fuck me, Shawn, _by sheer willpower alone.

"Son, Gus, Lassiter," Henry called from the living room, and it was like being doused with ice cold water. "You three forget that you went into the kitchen to get us some beers?"

"Uh," Lassiter spoke around the lump in his throat, and swallowed heavily; he blinked and breathed heavily through his nose, trying to will his flagging erection completely away. He looked from Gus to Shawn, and the three of them took a conjoined step toward the refrigerator. "We'll be right in Mr. Spencer."

"Call me Henry," the psychic's father said, and Lassiter nearly jumped out of his skin when the older Spencer clamped a hand on his shoulder. "You boys about done in here?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Uh, yes, sir," Lassiter responded, blushing like a middle school boy caught kissing on campus.

"There's a game waiting," Henry said, and he walked out with four beers gathered to his chest. Lassiter, Gus and Shawn all exchanged a look and then the three obediently followed the elder Spencer to the living room.

"We'll finish this later," Gus and Shawn whispered in concert.

"Peeps," Shawn said.

"Microwave," Gus added.

Swallowing, Lassiter nodded, wondering why a microwave was necessary when sugary coated peeps were involved, and strangely eager to find out. As he sat on the couch, next to the elder Mr. Spencer, he adjusted himself, and wrapped his hands around the cold can.

Keeping a careful eye on the clock, he tried not to imagine pink and blue sugared peeps engorging in the microwave as Gus and Shawn turned on the heat. Tried not to squirm, sandwiched between the elder and younger Spencers, as he was. Tried not to groan when Shawn's arm brushed against him, and when Guster, sitting on the floor, between his feet, leaned back, resting his head on the inside of his thigh.

"Boys, maybe you'd better take this upstairs," Henry said just after the first call had been made. "I think all three of you are about to do something that I do not want to witness. Come back down when you're done. I'll pause the game."

All three of them shot to their feet at once, and raced for the stairs, Lassiter taking them two at a time. He beat the other two up and then flopped down on Shawn's bed to wait. He still didn't know quite where he fit into the 'trio' (much better word than threesome), but he was eager to find out.

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Please review and let me know if you liked; it's like getting an Easter egg, only better.


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